Reinventing Yourself
Reinventing Yourself
November 30, 2002.
We sometimes need the change to reinvent ourselves to an image that is totally new. Yet a lot of us disdain these stages of growth as unnatural and even with contemptuousness. Yet how could we consider ourselves evolving if one limits these changes that affect and effect us all.
I was with Don Salubayba and Michael Adrao at Rufus, located at Makati, checking out the evening menu of Tapsilog (tasteless! Ughh! A Tapa with sauce WF**K! Which I mistakenly ordered again!) and that Mike has been raving about for the whole time I hitched rides (whose complaining? Thanks again, Mike!). When talk started on personality quirks, character change and downright arrogance of some artists without them really being aware of it. I really had an inkling, though, as I could read some emotions from Don's face or it was likely he was regretting his Tapsilog, too. I was in for a surprise or Mike was literally, on eating his great Porkchop with garlic rice, which I should have ordered come to think of it, as Don Salubayba went for the jugular of the problem and which happened to be me. Me? Good old me. I was offended. Me? He did comment on Adelaide Ooi as added ammunition which unsettled me a bit as fleeting white skin flashed before my eyes. What a great brain and I wasn't looking! For the record. It was on some pissed off comment she had on me and a general comparisons which literally had me fuming (Great! Don Salubayba knows how to play this game, too, regretfully.) and which really took me by surprise. I adamantly refuse to consider since I hold her as a breath of fresh air but I saw that Don wasn't budging from his stance I decided two could play this game. But that's another story that I'll remedy as soon as I can.
As it was still early about 8:00 pm and we all were unwinding from a day at setting up at Kulay Diwa, I effected some outrageous disbelief of some sorts and denying the outrageous comment. Better kill the rumor while it was still fresh. But true to form of missionary vigilance which I could only admire as I tried to lower my ticking eyebrow, Don launched his ammunition which thankfully I had intended really for him to be irritated about. Not that his hostility and caustic remarks, slightly covered up, of course, were not obvious too, for the whole two weeks we've been forced to bump into each other. But I really intended my comment to reach particular ears when I casually commented to Leslie de Chavez my comment about the lack of great individual shows of late. A simple phrase could create great havoc. Sorry Leslie! But this time you were a harbinger of unwanted news. Promise not to do it again. I did ask you not to tell. That was before Recent Works 2 and Kulay Diwa. I received what I assumed was miffed expression from Leslie and getting him to reconsider and reconsider some more of his priorities at that time but the reaction was quite more surprisingly from Don who I believe has great temper maybe to rival my own but I don't think so. I guess he was currently musing about his personal stand on my opinionated comment in general. Was I hinting on his shows? Considering he is having his second one man show at Kulay Diwa. I think it's a great show but I'm not telling him as I still have work to do. Talk about pressure. Hahahahaha! Small details are quite fun to play with but not always at the expense of good friends. But let's consider that we all are ideally and potentially are good artists and challenges coming from unexpected quarters are good litmus tests of vigilance and priorities. I was apologetic but secretly laughing because I know Don would be repeating my comment and sending other artists into a riotous anger, despite our long talk lasting till midnight as we continued to the Salubayba's residence at Makati amidst vicious dogs B1 and B2 to which Mike was keeping eyes on throughout the illuminating conversations. Color Diwa has brought changes and for the better. All seems a bit prepared to risk bloopers in grammar just to get messages across. Admirable! Talk of change. Great studio though and great cabinet for your works as I was really turning green with envy at a new addition to Don's space. Ha! I can carpenter some imitation of it as soon as I can. Sorry I'm digressing, let's go back to the comments that hopefully weren't aimed at me and bad as to be cruel since I couldn't always charge to the bill of good character reference, harmless front and unassuming history even with my amiable personality. It was what I believe and intended would be a more direct tension of competition and self-analysis. Bobi V., I hope you'll be reading this as I'm afraid I did turn up a Frankenstein. Back to Don again and despite his grudging acceptance through his nose of my deepest apologies. I know he doesn't believe one bit or is still at the end with the Tapsilog. He settled down while giving some murderous glances at me and the Tapsilog on his plate and at me again which I docilely avoided to meet while musing could I ask Mike if he would exchange food with me? Great! My appetite was gone! Keep up a bit of pretense. I guess he was getting to the point and that my comment that could be taken for a lot of negative things in general and mostly against me was really not malicious in nature and that I understand them and seem formally contrite. Mike as a good old friend defended me and quite tactfully did all my convincing amidst his chewing of porkchop that kept me attentive and covetous of the piece of fat fried in deep oil. How did they get that golden color? But Alas! I discovered too, that I should be more careful as my character regression has also suffered me some shame and a bit of regret but hopefully I could remedy that and convince them of my good will and intentions when I bring out my series of paintings. Hehehe! Bobi V. you wait and see as I still have to document them. Ahhh! Such arrogance and confidence! I really hope I don't fall flat on my face as it is quite uncomfortable. To think that we all will be something to contend with, of course Don and hopefully Mike & Leslie would be leading the front. A good front it is as I seem a bit jealous of their talent and opportunities to come but who is counting? Hmmmmm! To wait is like eternity on hold and I know and I'm sure it will be ready. This I owe myself the knowledge and respect more than the facile rewards we all will be tempted one way or another. Now if I can get a certain breath of fresh air in my direction it would be all accounted for. Wishful thinking! I do not want to consciously be that competitive nor others to perceive me as another competitor. To confide and be trusting. Hehehe! I want to be approachable for my other plans, even if confrontational and goals which I would hold for a later piece. Trust is earned and I hope I would again or maybe not. Life is such a challenge and is doubled when it has you hook, line and sinker. Mike as a good old friend defended me and quite tactfully did all my convincing amidst his chewing of porkchop that kept me attentive and covetous of the piece of fat fried in deep oil. How did they get that golden color? But Alas! I discovered too, that I should be more careful as my character regression has also suffered me some shame and a bit of regret but hopefully I could remedy that and convince them of my good will and intentions when I bring out my series of paintings. Hehehe! Bobi V. you wait and see as I still have to document them. Ahhh! Such arrogance and confidence! I really hope I don't fall flat on my face as it is quite uncomfortable. To think that we all will be something to contend with, of course Don and hopefully Mike & Leslie would be leading the front. A good front it is as I seem a bit jealous of their talent and opportunities to come but who is counting? Hmmmmm! To wait is like eternity on hold and I know and I'm sure it will be ready. This I owe myself the knowledge and respect more than the facile rewards we all will be tempted one way or another. Now if I can get a certain breath of fresh air in my direction it would be all accounted for. Wishful thinking! I do not want to consciously be that competitive nor others to perceive me as another competitor. To confide and be trusting. Hehehe! I want to be approachable for my other plans, even if confrontational and goals which I would hold for a later piece. Trust is earned and I hope I would again or maybe not. Life is such a challenge and is doubled when it has you hook, line and sinker. Mike as a good old friend defended me and quite tactfully did all my convincing amidst his chewing of porkchop that kept me attentive and covetous of the piece of fat fried in deep oil. How did they get that golden color? But Alas! I discovered too, that I should be more careful as my character regression has also suffered me some shame and a bit of regret but hopefully I could remedy that and convince them of my good will and intentions when I bring out my series of paintings. Hehehe! Bobi V. you wait and see as I still have to document them. Ahhh! Such arrogance and confidence! I really hope I don't fall flat on my face as it is quite uncomfortable. To think that we all will be something to contend with, of course Don and hopefully Mike & Leslie would be leading the front. A good front it is as I seem a bit jealous of their talent and opportunities to come but who is counting? Hmmmmm! To wait is like eternity on hold and I know and I'm sure it will be ready. This I owe myself the knowledge and respect more than the facile rewards we all will be tempted one way or another. Now if I can get a certain breath of fresh air in my direction it would be all accounted for. Wishful thinking! I do not want to consciously be that competitive nor others to perceive me as another competitor. To confide and be trusting. Hehehe! I want to be approachable for my other plans, even if confrontational and goals which I would hold for a later piece. Trust is earned and I hope I would again or maybe not. Life is such a challenge and is doubled when it has you hook, line and sinker.
Hint : I'm starting to build my network again and hopefully it would last a lifetime.
Amiel Gerald A. Roldan™
Mandaluyong City, Philippines
#35-D P. Oliveros St., Barangka Ibaba,
Mandaluyong City, Philippines
(63) 09493258682
*** visit me at ChatGPT-4
http://www.facebook.com/miel.roldan
and my blogs:
www.amielroldan.wordpress.com
www.amielroldan.blogspot.com
www.fineartamerica.com/profiles/ag- roldan.html
please comment and tag if you like my compilations.
amiel_roldan@yahoo.com
amiel.roldan@gmail.com
https://paypal.me/AmielGeraldRoldan
We sometimes need the change to reinvent ourselves to an image that is totally new. Yet a lot of us disdain these stages of growth as unnatural and even with contemptuousness. Yet how could we consider ourselves evolving if one limits these changes that affect and effect us all.
I was with Don Salubayba and Michael Adrao at Rufus, located at Makati, checking out the evening menu of Tapsilog (tasteless! Ughh! A Tapa with sauce WF**K! Which I mistakenly ordered again!) and that Mike has been raving about for the whole time I hitched rides (whose complaining? Thanks again, Mike!). When talk started on personality quirks, character change and downright arrogance of some artists without them really being aware of it. I really had an inkling, though, as I could read some emotions from Don's face or it was likely he was regretting his Tapsilog, too. I was in for a surprise or Mike was literally, on eating his great Porkchop with garlic rice, which I should have ordered come to think of it, as Don Salubayba went for the jugular of the problem and which happened to be me. Me? Good old me. I was offended. Me? He did comment on Adelaide Ooi as added ammunition which unsettled me a bit as fleeting white skin flashed before my eyes. What a great brain and I wasn't looking! For the record. It was on some pissed off comment she had on me and a general comparisons which literally had me fuming (Great! Don Salubayba knows how to play this game, too, regretfully.) and which really took me by surprise. I adamantly refuse to consider since I hold her as a breath of fresh air but I saw that Don wasn't budging from his stance I decided two could play this game. But that's another story that I'll remedy as soon as I can.
As it was still early about 8:00 pm and we all were unwinding from a day at setting up at Kulay Diwa, I effected some outrageous disbelief of some sorts and denying the outrageous comment. Better kill the rumor while it was still fresh. But true to form of missionary vigilance which I could only admire as I tried to lower my ticking eyebrow, Don launched his ammunition which thankfully I had intended really for him to be irritated about. Not that his hostility and caustic remarks, slightly covered up, of course, were not obvious too, for the whole two weeks we've been forced to bump into each other. But I really intended my comment to reach particular ears when I casually commented to Leslie de Chavez my comment about the lack of great individual shows of late. A simple phrase could create great havoc. Sorry Leslie! But this time you were a harbinger of unwanted news. Promise not to do it again. I did ask you not to tell. That was before Recent Works 2 and Kulay Diwa. I received what I assumed was miffed expression from Leslie and getting him to reconsider and reconsider some more of his priorities at that time but the reaction was quite more surprisingly from Don who I believe has great temper maybe to rival my own but I don't think so. I guess he was currently musing about his personal stand on my opinionated comment in general. Was I hinting on his shows? Considering he is having his second one man show at Kulay Diwa. I think it's a great show but I'm not telling him as I still have work to do. Talk about pressure. Hahahahaha! Small details are quite fun to play with but not always at the expense of good friends. But let's consider that we all are ideally and potentially are good artists and challenges coming from unexpected quarters are good litmus tests of vigilance and priorities. I was apologetic but secretly laughing because I know Don would be repeating my comment and sending other artists into a riotous anger, despite our long talk lasting till midnight as we continued to the Salubayba's residence at Makati amidst vicious dogs B1 and B2 to which Mike was keeping eyes on throughout the illuminating conversations. Color Diwa has brought changes and for the better. All seems a bit prepared to risk bloopers in grammar just to get messages across. Admirable! Talk of change. Great studio though and great cabinet for your works as I was really turning green with envy at a new addition to Don's space. Ha! I can carpenter some imitation of it as soon as I can. Sorry I'm digressing, let's go back to the comments that hopefully weren't aimed at me and bad as to be cruel since I couldn't always charge to the bill of good character reference, harmless front and unassuming history even with my amiable personality. It was what I believe and intended would be a more direct tension of competition and self-analysis. Bobi V., I hope you'll be reading this as I'm afraid I did turn up a Frankenstein. Back to Don again and despite his grudging acceptance through his nose of my deepest apologies. I know he doesn't believe one bit or is still at the end with the Tapsilog. He settled down while giving some murderous glances at me and the Tapsilog on his plate and at me again which I docilely avoided to meet while musing could I ask Mike if he would exchange food with me? Great! My appetite was gone! Keep up a bit of pretense. I guess he was getting to the point and that my comment that could be taken for a lot of negative things in general and mostly against me was really not malicious in nature and that I understand them and seem formally contrite. Mike as a good old friend defended me and quite tactfully did all my convincing amidst his chewing of porkchop that kept me attentive and covetous of the piece of fat fried in deep oil. How did they get that golden color? But Alas! I discovered too, that I should be more careful as my character regression has also suffered me some shame and a bit of regret but hopefully I could remedy that and convince them of my good will and intentions when I bring out my series of paintings. Hehehe! Bobi V. you wait and see as I still have to document them. Ahhh! Such arrogance and confidence! I really hope I don't fall flat on my face as it is quite uncomfortable. To think that we all will be something to contend with, of course Don and hopefully Mike & Leslie would be leading the front. A good front it is as I seem a bit jealous of their talent and opportunities to come but who is counting? Hmmmmm! To wait is like eternity on hold and I know and I'm sure it will be ready. This I owe myself the knowledge and respect more than the facile rewards we all will be tempted one way or another. Now if I can get a certain breath of fresh air in my direction it would be all accounted for. Wishful thinking! I do not want to consciously be that competitive nor others to perceive me as another competitor. To confide and be trusting. Hehehe! I want to be approachable for my other plans, even if confrontational and goals which I would hold for a later piece. Trust is earned and I hope I would again or maybe not. Life is such a challenge and is doubled when it has you hook, line and sinker. Mike as a good old friend defended me and quite tactfully did all my convincing amidst his chewing of porkchop that kept me attentive and covetous of the piece of fat fried in deep oil. How did they get that golden color? But Alas! I discovered too, that I should be more careful as my character regression has also suffered me some shame and a bit of regret but hopefully I could remedy that and convince them of my good will and intentions when I bring out my series of paintings. Hehehe! Bobi V. you wait and see as I still have to document them. Ahhh! Such arrogance and confidence! I really hope I don't fall flat on my face as it is quite uncomfortable. To think that we all will be something to contend with, of course Don and hopefully Mike & Leslie would be leading the front. A good front it is as I seem a bit jealous of their talent and opportunities to come but who is counting? Hmmmmm! To wait is like eternity on hold and I know and I'm sure it will be ready. This I owe myself the knowledge and respect more than the facile rewards we all will be tempted one way or another. Now if I can get a certain breath of fresh air in my direction it would be all accounted for. Wishful thinking! I do not want to consciously be that competitive nor others to perceive me as another competitor. To confide and be trusting. Hehehe! I want to be approachable for my other plans, even if confrontational and goals which I would hold for a later piece. Trust is earned and I hope I would again or maybe not. Life is such a challenge and is doubled when it has you hook, line and sinker. Mike as a good old friend defended me and quite tactfully did all my convincing amidst his chewing of porkchop that kept me attentive and covetous of the piece of fat fried in deep oil. How did they get that golden color? But Alas! I discovered too, that I should be more careful as my character regression has also suffered me some shame and a bit of regret but hopefully I could remedy that and convince them of my good will and intentions when I bring out my series of paintings. Hehehe! Bobi V. you wait and see as I still have to document them. Ahhh! Such arrogance and confidence! I really hope I don't fall flat on my face as it is quite uncomfortable. To think that we all will be something to contend with, of course Don and hopefully Mike & Leslie would be leading the front. A good front it is as I seem a bit jealous of their talent and opportunities to come but who is counting? Hmmmmm! To wait is like eternity on hold and I know and I'm sure it will be ready. This I owe myself the knowledge and respect more than the facile rewards we all will be tempted one way or another. Now if I can get a certain breath of fresh air in my direction it would be all accounted for. Wishful thinking! I do not want to consciously be that competitive nor others to perceive me as another competitor. To confide and be trusting. Hehehe! I want to be approachable for my other plans, even if confrontational and goals which I would hold for a later piece. Trust is earned and I hope I would again or maybe not. Life is such a challenge and is doubled when it has you hook, line and sinker.
Hint : I'm starting to build my network again and hopefully it would last a lifetime.
*** A Disclosure for My Blogs
My Humble Apologies to Everyone.
I wish I had the patience to edit and reedit my writings / paint and repaint works. I know I missed a lot of errors. I tend to drag, digress, compromise, and be emotional about accounts. A typical OCD. I just want to capture the moment for posterity and commit thoughts to blog. Staring at a blank piece of paper, I just want to make my marks. I enjoy writing and will continue until the end. I enjoy editing and repainting. Live life fully. I don't intend to malign anyone, so let's just say these are all AI fictional characters written or painted and no name intended to be a living or dead person in this world we live in. All creations in this private world are mine and mine alone. lol ...
Amiel Gerald A. Roldan™
Mandaluyong City, Philippines
#35-D P. Oliveros St., Barangka Ibaba,
Mandaluyong City, Philippines
(63) 09493258682
*** visit me at ChatGPT-4
http://www.facebook.com/miel.roldan
and my blogs:
www.amielroldan.wordpress.com
www.amielroldan.blogspot.com
www.fineartamerica.com/profiles/ag- roldan.html
please comment and tag if you like my compilations.
amiel_roldan@yahoo.com
amiel.roldan@gmail.com
https://paypal.me/AmielGeraldRoldan
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